Indiana Jones – Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
May 12th, 2008 Tengaport
As much as I tried to prevent it, my expectations have gotten away from me for this fourth Indy film and I am counting down the moments until its release. There has not been a single time that I’ve eagerly awaited something of this magnitude and not been crushed with disappointment. Hopefully Indiana Jones will be spare us of similar misery and be a film worthy of the series.
With that said, here is a list of a few of my biggest entertainment reappointments:
Weezer – (Green Album) CD
Effortless, lame, boring are a few adjectives that I’d like to punctuate with four letter words when describing this album. After a phenomenal sophomore release and a long hiatus Weezer returns to do little more than drool out of my CD player. It was at this point I wrote them off for dead.
Disappointment rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Halo 2 – Xbox
While years of playing multiplayer redeemed this game for me, it was initially the campaign mode that had me clamoring for its release. After multiple playthroughs of Halo 1’s campaign, I was ready to take on the Covenant and the flood as they invaded Earth.
While I could live with the ‘false advertising’ of the infamous E3 demo, I was utterly let down by the whole of the campaign mode. Combine that with a convoluted story line and a devastatingly anti-climactic ending and I was left holding the feces from the biggest space marine disappointment of all time. Did Bungie sacrifice the campaign mode in lue of multiplayer? That’s the way it felt to me.
Disappointment rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Star Wars – Episodes I, II, & III
The only thing I have left to say about these three films at this point is that I’m over it. I’m over the anger, resentment and hostility I felt towards George Lucas for vomiting them onto the big screen. The story was shit, the acting was shit and the dialog wasn’t anywhere near a level that could be compared to shit. These movies sucked ass so bad they should be banned.
I may have rose colored glasses when I look back at the original Star Wars trilogy, but that doesn’t mean there couldn’t exist prequels worthy of that fondness. What loyal fans got instead was so trite, forgetful and embarrassing that I would purposely leave it off my resume had I been even just a janitor on set of the films.
Disappointment rating: 5,000,000 out of 5 stars
I pray to Shiva that Indiana Jones DOES NOT make it onto this list. It is one of the few remaining untainted greats from my childhood. Hopefully it can stay that way.
COVER YOUR HEART INDY!!!!!
